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Actress in a Supporting Role

I put the ladies first, not because I'm woke (you've met me -- you know I'm one run-on sentence away from falling asleep at all times), but because this is the most competitive category. And the men are outnumbered by the women in my house.  

  • Maria Bakalova, Borat Subsequent Moviefilm: Delivery of Prodigious Bribe to American Regime for Make Benefit Once Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan

    • Loved the interview she gave Colbert. "...and this is your first film!" "My first American film." That's us -- if it didn't happen here, it didn't happen.

  • Glenn Close, Hillbilly Elegy

    • The only great thing in an otherwise ok film. I'm on her side -- she's an incredible actress and she's been robbed at least once (Peggy Ashcroft over her performance in The Natural?), but I have a much stronger attachment to a slightly longer shot (below).

  • Olivia Colman, The Father

    • This is a terrific performance, but I kept wondering when she was going to meet with the Prime Minister. I have alcohol-induced focus issues.

  • Amanda Seyfried, Mank

    • A surprising performance much different than anything I've seen her do before, but then I realized that could be me -- suddenly good looking, but still constantly sotted.  

  • Yuh-Jung Youn, Minari

    • Oh, please, let this woman win. She was at once difficult, horrifying, hilarious. This is a tremendous performance in a movie not enough people watched. [N.B. I fired up Google Translate, but have no grounding at all in Korean so became paranoid my 'rooting for your earthy organic performance' would come out as 'bury the old white guy in the ground like kimchi']

Democratic Response

 Are will still doing this, with the tired, 15th century gender labels?  Must our actors be divided chromosomally, like they are trapped in a Mad Men-era underwire bra?!?  WHEN will this cis-end?!?

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Ok, the category.  We'll say Yuh-Jung Youn, Minari, but will someone address the violence against Asian vegetables in this film? I'm not even apologizing for the spoiler -- it's a racist country. It's a movie about Asian people. Who had vegetables. What did you think was going to happen?

Republican Response

Glenn Close, Hillbilly Elegy.  

She represented the hard working, forgotten Americans of coal country, God country, Trump country.

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And how dare the Hollyweirds debase a true American hero like America's 'Merican Mayor, Rudy Giulliani? This was a total setup, entrapping a great man with a near fellacious...uh, felonious ruse. A man of his stature, girth and dress-standards is likely to have a tuck issue from time-to-time, whether due to his 20-year-old Brioni suits or his 76-year-old....cucuzza.

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